Breakfast with Solomon - Proverbs 5:3
"For the lips of an adulteress drip honey and smoother than oil is her speech"
The key word is the word For – Solomon has just been telling us that one has to be careful that wisdom doesn't slip through your fingers. It is possible to be disoriented and to miss the plan that God has for you. And then he tells us the source of the disorientation: the lips of the adulteress. When you are in the midst of adulterous love, you believe the words that you are being told. They have no basis in long-term reality, but you believe them.
What is interesting is that God tells us through Solomon's words that the only antidote to those words is not to hear them and to stay far away from the door of her house. Verse 8 Even if you know all the bad things that will happen to the person who commits adultery, the promised affection is so intoxicating and disorienting that you may do it anyway if you allow yourself to be captured by the words, beauty, or touch.
It is the lips or words of the adulteress or adulterer that carry the great drawing power. The words of the adulteress always suggest that you are wanted, you are admired, you are fascinating, I enjoy listening to you talk, I could listen to you talk for hours. The fact that the adulteress has such drawing power through her words and listening ability says that these areas are huge needs for men and women. Men especially are drawn toward the person who admires them, wants them, listens attentively to them, and follows those conversations with sex. Solomon says that the power of those needs in men is so strong that it will draw men out of their marriage vows, so it is best if they never hear those words. Notice that later Solomon says to find a way to increase the depth of your relationship with your spouse. He is counseling that you find a way to have those needs met by your spouse.
It is too disorienting to have someone even pretend to meet your deepest needs. The drawing power of these needs is so strong that all your moral training can be overcome in a short period under the wonder of these needs. If one looks at the top needs of a man, six of the seven could be met in these encounters: Respect, Adaptation, Intimacy, Companionship, Attractive, Listening. These six pull too hard at the fiber of a man to resist if he has been caught by the power of her words. It is better not to even listen to the words. Stay away; you can't resist. Go home and strengthen the ties to your wife.