Breakfast with Solomon - Matthew 7:12
"In everything, therefore, treat people the same way you want them to treat you, for this is the Law and the Prophets"
This is consistently called the Golden Rule -- a level of ethical maturity that few attain to. It is so much deeper than that, however, it is a formula for how to live and to have people treat you the way you would like them to treat you. What do you want people to do or give to you? Is it respect, honor, position, authority, love, money? Then give it to them is what Jesus is saying. You do the thing first that you/they need, and they will turn around and meet your need.
We water down this principle until it is a nice platitude but largely useless. Jesus is speaking a very powerful principle: Do for others first what you want them to eventually give you, and it will take place. You go first with the giving, the effort, and the love. But if you demand that they give it to you first, you will most likely never get what it is you want.
What is surprising is that it is stated in the "what you want" terms. It is not stated in the "what God wants" terms. Do for others what you want, what you wish. You do it first and then it will come to you. You determine what it is that you want others to treat you like – what it is that you want them to do for you and then you do it first for them, and it will come to you.
It would make more sense to our selfish ears to hear "take what you want from others and then give it to them if they have been good about giving what you want." But that is not the way Jesus says that the world is wired to work. Give what you want and you will get it, but do not wait or do not take or it will never come.
This explains so much in life: why we didn't get the promotion; why we didn't get the love of the girl; why we didn't become successful. It even explains why we did not get what we wanted out of marriage or our children. It was because we did not give it to them first.
When you want it so desperately you are trying to figure out ways to get it away from the others, but the secret is to give it to others first before they deserve it and then you will get it as well.