"Men do not despise a thief if he steals to satisfy himself when he is hungry."
Solomon changes the argument to talk about the deep loathing that surrounds the person who breaks another person's marriage to fulfill his own self desires.
Solomon is painting a vivid picture of a destroyed reputation. A man's pride is at stake. He needs to realize that this is not a secret sin. He needs to think about the destruction of his reputation way before he gets anywhere near that kind of sin. It is too late when you are under the pull of temptation. The place to contemplate this is when you are putting out the plan of your life. This is when you plan out what kind of reputation you want. If you do not want it to have a stain that will not wash out, then build proper boundaries around you and another person's spouse and/or any sexual sin.
I have seen this sin up close too many times as I have had to confront men, and even pastors, about immorality. It is always the same devastation when it comes out. It is always a deep stain where others cannot trust them in the same way after this comes out. I have recently watched as a young man caught in adultery struck me as just wandering in a daze, being reproached by all sides. Even when he was offered help he didn't know whether he wanted it. Now your spouse doesn't know if he/she can trust you. Your friends don't know if they can trust you. Your kids don't know how to treat you. Your colleagues don't know how to deal with you.
Solomon is saying this is not the same kind of sin as even stealing. There is at least some explanation for stealing if you are desperate. You have to pay it back, but it is redeemable. But adultery is a permanent stain – a permanent weakness that only in the grace of God can a person overcome. Do not go down this road, Solomon instructs. I am discouraged that our culture – through the magazines, the television, the movies, the books – all want to downplay the significance of fornication and adultery. It is not a big deal they say; everybody cheats on their spouse. Don't listen to them. Everybody does not cheat on their spouse. And it is a ride on a picket fence for those who do.
Until tomorrow,
Gil Stieglitz